Saturday, October 23, 2004

"Shorties, and the act of popping them"

In grade 7, I was an akward, skinny, unconfident boy starting at a new
school. I didn't know anybody. But that year I would meet someone
who would be my close friend - and remains so to this day.

Jason is a unique character. Unique in the only sense of the word.
Not "really unique," "kinda unique," "truly unique," or even "very
unique." He is unique. He is a big, strong man with a soft heart and
a propensity for doing things that are kinda dumb but funny all at the
same time. To know him is to know that he's smart, but he does stupid
things. He is not a scatterbrain, but he is in no way what I would
call a responsible person.

Two days ago, I found out that he and his wife were having a baby.
Although congratulations were in order, I was in a state of awe.

So I wrote another long-time (and mutual) friend, Mark. I asked him
about what he thought of the baby, and here's what he wrote. I
consider this email a classic.

"If you're talking about shorties, and the act of popping them, I knew
from the get go. Here is something that is going to sound trippy...
It may even blow your mind and resign you to an institution...The
sheer magnitude of the following statement may turn your world
inside-out, reverse the effects of gravity, spiral us all through a
black hole and into another dimension where it is cold in the summer,
it rains coffee, and there are no such thing as manhole covers..After
pondering this statement it will be as if you are constantly looking
through rose colored sunglasses...

JASON BAKER IS GOING TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR A HUMAN BEING OTHER THAN HIMSELF.

Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

Mark

ps: I hope it's a boy so I can fight him."

I thought you'd enjoy that.

And the funny thing is, I think Jason is going to be a good father.

1 Comments:

Blogger Peyres said...

"Akward, skinny, unconfident boy starting at a new
school"

Sounds like me :D

6:18 PM  

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